Having made it through the first week of December you are looking for one of two things. Either, you want Christmas to be injected directly into your eyeballs. Or you want to kick Christmas in the balls. Assuming that you stay inside tonight – with Song By Toad's inevitably brilliant Christmas do happening ce soir, and no doubt being a very popular night for work Christmas parties in general – then it's a split double bill being recommended today.

The Santa Clause (1994)

John Pasquin, 97 mins

A film in which Tim Allen becomes Santa Claus, you've seen it and it's great – very funny if you are in the right mood. But rather than bore you with me saying that you should see this, I'd prefer to take a moment of your time to consider how I would describe this film if I was to write for TV Times or equivalent:

The Santa Clause:

and no – that isn't a typo! The Santa “Clause” sees Tim Allen face an hilarious legal conundrum, as his world is turned upside down thanks to a litigious mishap which sees him kill Santa, and have to become him. This is a classic Christmas film about a murderous man struggling with an identity crisis and a magical onset of diabetes.

If you are reading Radio Times or whatever, hire me. Now.

Brazil (1985)

Terry Gilliam, 132 mins

Set in Brazil (lie), Terry Gilliam's joyous won

derland (not true) sees an entirely formulaic portrayal of the future (unbelievably wrong) in which everyone lives and rich and fulfilling life (kill me now). It's a happy-go-lucky festival of unquestioned

consumerism and delight (not at all) that casino online will definitely make you feel a warm fuzzy feeling in celebrating the birth of Christ our lord (this bit might be true).

I'm not sure why I begun my analysis of Brazil like that, but I've kept it in regardless. If you've not seen Brazil, I don't want to speak to you until you have. As usual for a Terry Gilliam film, there is more invention in a single frame than most films will display in an entire, box office record smashing, trilogy. Next to Twelve Monkeys, this is probably Gilliam's real masterpiece, exploring a dystopian world borrowed heavily from the sentiment of Orwell's classic text 1984 – and tells a story that Gilliam was destined to direct. If, like me, the first week of December has made you want to see the death of Santa by decapitation this will honestly warm the cockles – and even if Christmas is still your cup of tea (extra cinnamon), please watch this film and celebrate the pure imagination and creativity which makes Christmas what it needs to be: childlike and beautiful, filtered through the despair of winter. Watch this:

Plus, I think this is the only film to feature Robert De Niro in this series, but I could be wrong. Get your fill now, just in case.